Heather Edwards, Author at Heather Edwards Mental Health Counseling

The Normalcy Paradox: Is it too soon?

May 25, 2021

One year ago, after more than a month in lockdown, you yearned for a return to normalcy. However, weighing that desire against the real threat of death, you opted for safety and stayed home, many alone and in fear. Today, 128 million people are fully vaccinated against COVID-19 in the United States, and 282 million are partially vaccinated. Mask mandates and social distancing requirements are loosening. For many, it’s a ticket to freedom. For others, to roam freely seems a scary and potentially deadly proposition. So, the normalcy paradox emerges. You want it and you fear it. You are having mixed feelings like excitement and reluctance, curiosity and hesitation. In my virtual therapy room, I’m hearing concerns like the following: I’ve changed and my body has...

breathe COVID-19 EMDR fear lockdown loss mindful normalcy pandemic resilience strengths trauma triggers trust

CBT: Spring Clean Your Mindset

April 12, 2021

Anxiety, Lifestyle, Stress Management

Spring has sprung! Just as Mother Nature ditches the dreary dormant season of winter, CBT can shift your mindset from doom to bloom. Think of it as a spring cleaning for your brain. So, grab the mental Swiffer and dust out the cobwebs. Spray the virtual Windex to clear the fog. It's time to blossom. It’s easy to fall into the habit of negative thinking. The shorter, darker, colder days of winter have a real effect on mood and energy. Over time, it can affect your attitudes, beliefs, feelings, and behaviors. You might begin to automatically assume worst case scenario's. That fearful belief provokes an anxious feeling that further validates the fear that something will go wrong. It’s a vicious cycle that feeds on itself. It’s partially rooted...

anxiety CBT depression mental health mindset psychology self talk spring stress thoughts wellness

Anxiety and Lockdown

December 9, 2020

Anxiety, Stress Management, Trauma

Anxiety is on the rise. As we approach another lockdown, you anticipate uncomfortable feelings. You notice parts of yourself vying for attention - the ones that feel fear, loneliness, and shame. The anxiety of unfinished business from the past, beckons your acknowledgment and soothing. Without the external distractions of work, shopping, and appointments, you are forced to sit with your internal world. There are many ways to distract yourself from this discomfort. You can go for a walk, watch a movie, call a friend, dance in your bedroom, or take a class online. It's a temporary "fix" but, will all this “doing” result in healing? What if this is the time to stop doing? What if all this doing has kept you stuck in unproductive being? And what if...

anxiety brain Feelings lockdown stress trauma wellness

EMDR Therapy: Rewrite your story

September 29, 2020

Trauma

EMDR Therapy opens windows in the mind. Imagine rewriting your story. One where YOU decide who you are, how you can be, and how life's challenges affect you. Take a moment to notice how you view yourself in the world. Complete the statement, ”I am_____”. Is your belief negative, such as, “I am unworthy.”, “I am powerless.”, or ”I am unsafe.”? If so, that core belief may be tied to earlier unprocessed memories. What if you could believe something else? What would you rather believe about yourself? I am strong, safe, capable, worthy, lovable, smart… People decide to start EMDR therapy because of anxiety, depression, or pervasive negative beliefs. Francine Shapiro, the originator and developer of EMDR therapy stated that often these experiences are the result of unprocessed memories. When...

EMDR healing heather edwards letting go mental health psychology Psychotherapy

Butterflies: Proof of change for good

July 7, 2020

Anxiety, Stress Management

Change doesn’t happen comfortably. Just when the caterpillar's world was ending, it became a butterfly. The extenuating circumstances you are in right now are also a new beginning. Uncertainty. Isolation. Fear. Instability. Change. Transformation. Transcendence. Each has an affect on mental health, for better or worse. Each is an opportunity for greater compassion. Your everyday life looks distinctly different than it did a few months ago. Whether you’ve been on lockdown, protesting with Black Lives Matter, or struggling to keep a roof over your head or business - this is a time of unprecedented and profound change. You’re experiencing change in how you socialize, work, educate, love, heal, and relate to the world. It’s unfamiliar, uncomfortable, and uncertain. Traumas are triggered. Self preservation is awakened. The status quo is upended. Emotions are...

Black Lives Matter BLM butterfly caterpillar change compassion lockdown mental health psychology stress

Pandemic Life: 3 Conversations

June 2, 2020

Uncategorized

Does it feel like you’re in a time warp? Is making decisions and prioritizing a challenge? Are you easily upset? If you answered yes to any of these questions, you might be living in a pandemic. Lately, therapy conversations related to the threat of COVID-19 revolve around three main concerns. 1. An altered relationship to time. 2. A reevaluation of needs. 3. How the central nervous system reacts to the pervasive threat of death. Let’s start with time. Your normal routine is up-ended. The people you saw, places you went, and appointments you kept are just a memory. You’re not rushing to catch a train, changing your clothes to go to the gym, or squeezing in a visit to a doctor’s office during the workday. You’re losing track of the hours in...

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Ritual. Grief. Quarantine.

April 15, 2020

Stress Management

Ritual. It brings family, friends, and communities together. It binds you in your values. It bonds you in your shared beliefs. It connects your mind, body, and spirit. But what if rituals don't exist? Sunday was Easter. I’m not a terribly religious person, but I knew that I wouldn’t be with my family for a traditional gathering. And it felt like a freight train rolled in and parked on my chest. I woke up sad. The familiar heavy fog of longing for something that wouldn’t be, had settled in while I slept. My family ritual was not happening today. And I'm not alone in that. Weddings, funerals, bar & bat mitzvah's, seders, school & sports events, and more have also been cancelled or modified. It's a loss...

anxiety depression fear grief quarantine ritual SAD wellness

Control vs Concern during quarantine

April 7, 2020

Anxiety

Right now, things feel out of control. And when things feel out of control, a sense of fear and helplessness can take over your thoughts. You become the metaphorical rat in a maze searching for a way out, or around, the dreaded worst-case-scenario. This can be paralyzing from a psychological perspective. But what if there are things you can influence right now? What if there was a way to discern the difference between your concerns and your control or influence? When the two get muddled together, you lose the distinction between what you can actually change, and what you can't. Then you swan dive into the rabbit hole of hopelessness and isolation. Many people are struggling with control during quarantine. Control leads to self efficacy, feeling proactive, and grounded. So,...

anxiety control coping Coronavirus COVID-19 depression mindfulness psychology quarantine stress wellness

COVID-19: Seeking a silver lining

March 31, 2020

Anxiety

COVID-19 is frightening. Most of us are wondering what COVID-19 will mean for our future. Not knowing what to expect is stressful. In fact, the three largest contributors to stress are: 1. uncertainty; 2. lack of information; and 3. lack of control. I’d say the Coronavirus has checked all three boxes. Many people are struggling with boundaries, privacy, and managing emotions while quarantining at home. Negotiating space, finding ”me time” for self care, and sitting with the uncomfortable feelings challenge even the best coping strategies. So, let’s get back to basics. There’s no magic bullet but perhaps the closest thing is gratitude. Take a breath, get grounded in the now, and connect with your core values. Look around you and notice how many have manifested in your...

brain breath coping Coronavirus COVID-19 Feelings gratitude mindfulness neuroscience rewiring values

Lust and Love: 3 fire starters

February 14, 2020

Uncategorized

Valentine’s Day inspires love, lust, and for some… disdain. If you fall into the latter group, this blog’s for you. What if your flames of passion have dwindled to a cold, damp, smoldering ash? Or the only “action” you’re getting is a cycle of conflict and avoidance? Or worse, you’re still fumbling blindly seeking the match to ignite the fire that won’t light up. Love and lust are action words. In other words, a verb. And a verb is defined as, “a word used to describe an action, state, or occurrence, ...

#relationships love lust psychology Valentine's Day wellness

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Author: Heather Edwards