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Stress Management

Heather Edwards Mental Health Counseling / Stress Management

How Setting Boundaries is a Love Language

January 22, 2025
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Anxiety, Relationships, Stress Management

Blurry Boundaries: There’s a quiet tension in undefined spaces. Seeing clear boundaries as a love language is counterintuitive. Let’s be real: we’ve all been there. You don’t want to say “no” because it feels mean or harsh, so you give a half-hearted “sure” or just leave things up in the air. And what happens? Everyone’s confused, tensions rise, and you end up feeling drained. Spoiler alert: trying to “soften the blow” by avoiding clear boundaries doesn’t work—it just makes things worse for everyone. Here’s the hard truth: blurry boundaries are messy. They tap into three of life’s biggest stressors—lack of information, uncertainty, and lack of control. If you’re avoiding the “no” because you think it’s kinder, you’re actually creating a situation where nobody knows what’s happening, and...

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holiday survival Heather Edwards

Oh, it’s on! Your holiday survival guide

November 28, 2024
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Anxiety, Lifestyle, Managing the Holidays, Stress Management

Okay, let’s be real for a second—this year feels weird. Autumn in the Northeast is giving us summer vibes, and Thanksgiving is super late. Is it just me, or does it feel like the holiday season popped up out of nowhere? One second we’re sipping iced lattes in October, and the next, we’re defrosting turkeys and hunting for Black Friday deals. Whiplash anyone? Holiday survival guide, please. And now it’s time to head to Aunt Sally’s for the annual family extravaganza. You know the one: the same casserole dishes, the same arguments, and somehow, the same side-eye from Cousin Linda about your “life choices.” Family, am I right? But don’t worry—I got you. Whether it’s navigating surprise political debates, fielding awkward comments about your love life...

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normalcy

The Normalcy Paradox: Is it too soon?

May 25, 2021
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Anxiety, Lifestyle, Stress Management

One year ago, after more than a month in lockdown, you yearned for a return to normalcy. However, weighing that desire against the real threat of death, you opted for safety and stayed home, many alone and in fear. Today, 128 million people are fully vaccinated against COVID-19 in the United States, and 282 million are partially vaccinated. Mask mandates and social distancing requirements are loosening. For many, it’s a ticket to freedom. For others, to roam freely seems a scary and potentially deadly proposition.  So, the normalcy paradox emerges. You want it and you fear it. You are having mixed feelings like excitement and reluctance, curiosity and hesitation. In my virtual therapy room, I’m hearing concerns like the following: I’ve changed and my body has...

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CBT

CBT: Spring Clean Your Mindset

April 12, 2021
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Anxiety, Lifestyle, Stress Management

Spring has sprung! Just as Mother Nature ditches the dreary dormant season of winter, CBT can shift your mindset from doom to bloom. Think of it as a spring cleaning for your brain. So, grab the mental Swiffer and dust out the cobwebs. Spray the virtual Windex to clear the fog. It's time to blossom. It’s easy to fall into the habit of negative thinking.  The shorter, darker, colder days of winter have a real effect on mood and energy.  Over time, it can affect your attitudes, beliefs, feelings, and behaviors.  You might begin to automatically assume worst case scenario's.  That fearful belief provokes an anxious feeling that further validates the fear that something will go wrong.  It’s a vicious cycle that feeds on itself.  It’s  partially rooted...

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anxiety

Anxiety and Lockdown

December 9, 2020
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Anxiety, Stress Management, Trauma

Anxiety is on the rise. As we approach another lockdown, you anticipate uncomfortable feelings.  You notice parts of yourself vying for attention - the ones that feel fear, loneliness, and shame. The anxiety of unfinished business from the past, beckons your acknowledgment and soothing.  Without the external distractions of work, shopping, and appointments, you are forced to sit with your internal world. There are many ways to distract yourself from this discomfort. You can go for a walk, watch a movie, call a friend, dance in your bedroom, or take a class online. It's a temporary "fix" but, will all this “doing” result in healing? What if this is the time to stop doing? What if all this doing has kept you stuck in unproductive being? And what if...

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change

Butterflies: Proof of change for good

July 7, 2020
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Anxiety, Stress Management

Change doesn’t happen comfortably.  Just when the caterpillar's world was ending, it became a butterfly. The extenuating circumstances you are in right now are also a new beginning. Uncertainty. Isolation. Fear. Instability. Change. Transformation. Transcendence. Each has an affect on mental health, for better or worse. Each is an opportunity for greater compassion. Your everyday life looks distinctly different than it did a few months ago. Whether you’ve been on lockdown, protesting with Black Lives Matter, or struggling to keep a roof over your head or business - this is a time of unprecedented and profound change.  You’re experiencing change in how you socialize, work, educate, love, heal, and relate to the world.  It’s unfamiliar, uncomfortable, and uncertain. Traumas are triggered. Self preservation is awakened. The status quo is upended. Emotions are...

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ritual grief quarantine

Ritual. Grief. Quarantine.

April 15, 2020
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Stress Management

Ritual. It brings family, friends, and communities together. It binds you in your values. It bonds you in your shared beliefs. It connects your  mind, body, and spirit. But what if rituals don't exist? Sunday was Easter. I’m not a terribly religious person, but I knew that I wouldn’t be with my family for a traditional gathering. And it felt like a freight train rolled in and parked on my chest. I woke up sad. The familiar heavy fog of longing for something that wouldn’t be, had settled in while I slept. My family ritual was not happening today. And I'm not alone in that. Weddings, funerals, bar & bat mitzvah's, seders, school & sports events, and more have also been cancelled or modified. It's a loss...

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trauma, emdr, therapy

Dear Trauma: EMDR changes lives

February 5, 2020
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Anxiety, Stress Management, Trauma

Dear trauma, I don’t need you anymore. You served a purpose and kept me safe in the face of danger. But now you’re getting in my way. I got this. Yours truly. When trauma happens, your central nervous system reacts in one of 4 ways to protect you:  Fight - physically defending yourself  Flight - running away Freeze - if I don’t move, they won’t see me - think deer in headlights Faint - playing dead It’s involuntary and automatic. It’s your body‘s way of protecting you in the moment. So, thank your body for doing that - and let it know you’re safe now. In the case of PTSD and limiting beliefs, it’s not enough to know you’re safe. Your body's protective mechanisms get frozen in time...

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2020 Vision: 29 life-balance tips

January 7, 2020
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Stress Management

Make 2020 a breakthrough year. Stress, fatigue, and overwhelm can keep your head spinning and your to-do list growing. Get off the hamster wheel in 2020 and begin taking corrective action. It’s counterintuitive but, it all starts with slowing down. Make 2020 the year of YOU. Follow these simple tips to hit the reset button. Build clarity, energy, and focus...

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