How to Flip Holiday Madness into Mindfulness
The magic of the holidays is upon us and behold, it can speed toward madness or mindfulness. Some call it the holiday bustle. Others call it pandemonium. Try these 7 tips. ...
depression Tag
CBT: Spring Clean Your Mindset
Spring has sprung! Just as Mother Nature ditches the dreary dormant season of winter, CBT can shift your mindset from doom to bloom. Think of it as a spring cleaning for your brain. So, grab the mental Swiffer and dust out the cobwebs. Spray the virtual Windex to clear the fog. It's time to blossom. It’s easy to fall into the habit of negative thinking. The shorter, darker, colder days of winter have a real effect on mood and energy. Over time, it can affect your attitudes, beliefs, feelings, and behaviors. You might begin to automatically assume worst case scenario's. That fearful belief provokes an anxious feeling that further validates the fear that something will go wrong. It’s a vicious cycle that feeds on itself. It’s partially rooted...
Ritual. Grief. Quarantine.
Ritual. It brings family, friends, and communities together. It binds you in your values. It bonds you in your shared beliefs. It connects your mind, body, and spirit. But what if rituals don't exist? Sunday was Easter. I’m not a terribly religious person, but I knew that I wouldn’t be with my family for a traditional gathering. And it felt like a freight train rolled in and parked on my chest. I woke up sad. The familiar heavy fog of longing for something that wouldn’t be, had settled in while I slept. My family ritual was not happening today. And I'm not alone in that. Weddings, funerals, bar & bat mitzvah's, seders, school & sports events, and more have also been cancelled or modified. It's a loss...
Control vs Concern during quarantine
Right now, things feel out of control. And when things feel out of control, a sense of fear and helplessness can take over your thoughts. You become the metaphorical rat in a maze searching for a way out, or around, the dreaded worst-case-scenario. This can be paralyzing from a psychological perspective. But what if there are things you can influence right now? What if there was a way to discern the difference between your concerns and your control or influence? When the two get muddled together, you lose the distinction between what you can actually change, and what you can't. Then you swan dive into the rabbit hole of hopelessness and isolation. Many people are struggling with control during quarantine. Control leads to self efficacy, feeling proactive, and grounded. So,...
Dear Trauma: EMDR changes lives
Dear trauma, I don’t need you anymore. You served a purpose and kept me safe in the face of danger. But now you’re getting in my way. I got this. Yours truly. When trauma happens, your central nervous system reacts in one of 4 ways to protect you: Fight - physically defending yourself Flight - running away Freeze - if I don’t move, they won’t see me - think deer in headlights Faint - playing dead It’s involuntary and automatic. It’s your body‘s way of protecting you in the moment. So, thank your body for doing that - and let it know you’re safe now. In the case of PTSD and limiting beliefs, it’s not enough to know you’re safe. Your body's protective mechanisms get frozen in time...
Suicide Prevention: How to get help
I was recently interviewed by a freelance writer for an article about suicide prevention for a dating website. When it goes live, I will post it here. For now, I’m sharing some important information about how to help someone who might be in danger. Have you noticed posts on social media that sound threatening? Or have you heard vague references to self harm? If so, take action. Definitely tell someone. This could be a cry for help. You can talk to your friend if you think it would be helpful or family members and friends who could reach out to them. Don’t gossip or blow it off. Take it seriously. This could be a life or death situation. Be prepared with phone numbers to crisis counseling services...
Insomnia Tips: Sleep like a baby
Insomnia wrecks your mood, energy, and focus. Kayla Johnson from Tuck realizes this and requested that I share sleep resources with my readers. A good night's rest regretfully eludes many of us. Consequently, the outcomes can be dire. Insomnia has many links to mental illness as a cause and an effect. I'll share a few of Tuck's insights and research findings here. Chronically sleep-deprived people, some 20 percent of Americans, are more prone to costly diseases, accidents, and workplace absenteeism, at a steep cost to our national and global economy. The cost of drowsy driving motor vehicle accidents alone is estimated at $56 billion per year. Shift workers, healthcare workers, long-haul truck drivers, military operators, and others in jobs with demanding hours are at higher risk for sleep deprivation and...
5 Signs You’re an Overanalyzer: And how to kick the habit
Are you plagued by indecision? Do you overanalyze whether or not there's a hidden meaning behind someone's words? Do you look for the possible trap or snafu that will make everything blow up in your face and leave you riddled with regret or shame? These thinking patterns can be debilitating if you run away with them. When you simply observe, rather that get consumed by them, you can keep a healthy distance and choose a different path. Here are five signs that you could be an over analyzer. Your friends keep saying, ”Just let it go.”. You feel more stressed, instead of less stressed, by trying to make the right decision. Your default internal monologue is, “I don’t know what to do.”, and you mentally go in...
The Deep Blue Sea: Calm the emotional tides
The ocean has a powerful and instantaneous way of clearing emotional clutter. It brings us back to our baseline and fills us with a calm energy. Here are 12 of my favorite quotes about the cleansing and uplifting qualities of this immense beauty. 1. When anxious, uneasy and bad thoughts come, I go to the sea, and the sea drowns them out with its great wide sounds, cleanses me with its noise, and imposes a rhythm upon everything in me that is bewildered and confused. -Rainer Maria Rilke 2. The sea, once it casts its spell, holds one in its net of wonder forever. -Jacques Cousteau 3. “Doesn’t it seem to you,” asked Madame Bovary, “that the mind moves more freely in the presence of that boundless expanse,...
Is Shame Holding You Back? You are worthy.
Let’s go alternate reality. Yes, AR. What’s your biggest wish for this year? Five years from now? Or for your lifetime? Tap into the full experience of that image. Be the hero in your own game. One where you make the rules. You tell the story. You determine the outcome. What’s there? Who’s there? Smell the scents, see the colors, connect to the people, hear the sounds, engage with your surroundings. Notice the energy that fills you up. Close your eyes. Lock it in. Wait. Did I hear the voice of self doubt? Disbelief? Uncertainty? It’s okay. It’s what we do. Notice it and dismiss it. Shift your focus to what you want. The nasty little self critic gremlin works hard at sabotaging your dreams. It’s...
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