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Confessions of an HGTV Addict: How it mirrors therapy

I admit it.  Although most of my waking hours are spent focused on my work, family, and various hobbies, my guilty pleasure is watching an episode of Property Brothers, House Hunters, or Love It or List It on HGTV.  They’re utterly decadent in this fast paced New York City rat race to the finish line - which inevitably keeps moving away the closer we get to it! It’s been a few years since this HGTV affliction began - and with the passing of time it doesn’t seem to dissipate.  To better understand the fascination and sheer pleasure experienced, I decided to take a closer look at the dynamic layers of content in each show. To begin, all are about homes.  Who doesn’t love home?  It’s where the...

Psychology Today – The Fire of Love

Do You Want A Better Love Life?  This article was published on February 12, 2014 in Psychology Today.  It was coauthored by  Mark Banschick, M.D. We all want love. We want to be seen, validated, treasured and wanted. And we want to give. We want the freshness of love to invigorate our lives and put the whole world into perspective. Love is more than sex…more than adoration…more than warm memories. It is alive and vibrant, like a warm fire on a cold winter’s day. Keep it stoked and it stays alive. Let it lie fallow, and don’t expect it to last. With winter upon us, we've teamed up with guest blogger Heather Edwards about kindling more love in your life. Good things need attention – it’s a lesson about happiness. A Day of Love  Consider...

Empower Your Inner Goddess – Yoga and Coaching Beach Retreat

Stretch your body. Nourish your soul. Free your spirit. Relax in the quiet seaside retreat of Kismet, Fire Island: Join a small group of amazing women eager to find their center, build their energy, develop their passion, and empower their spirit. Realign your body and mind: Experience Beach Yoga, Coaching for Visualizing Your Ideal Self, De-cluttering Your Mind, Building Energy Sources, Improving Your Mind-Body-Emotion Connection, Embracing Empowering Beliefs, Sunset Yoga, Yoga Dance, Chakra Meditation and Relaxation Exercises. Leave the island feeling invigorated and ready to live an inspired, confident, and passionate life! Our program features: Fresh whole foods and juices.  Breakfast x2, Lunch x2, Dinner x2, and healthy snacks. Mealtimes are relaxed.  Enjoy healthy, balanced nutrition and the company of creative, inspired Retreat participants and instructors. Fall asleep to the sound of waves crashing...

The Four Horsemen vs. The Michelangelo Effect

The problems are obvious.  What are the solutions? Sometimes the key to discovering what works best in a relationship is evaluating and eliminating what we know doesn’t work.  We know there are a few scientifically proven actions that destroy relationships.  John Gottman calls these the “Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse”.  So let’s start there. The first is Criticism.  Unless this is constructive with the intent of helping, it’s probably hurtful.  In destructive criticism, couples will attack each other’s personality or character in an effort to prove who is right and who is wrong.  It leaves both feeling angry and dissatisfied in the long and short run.  These statements tend to start with generalizations, and include absolute words like “always” and “never”. The second is Contempt.  In this communication...

Everyday is Valentine’s Day

Valentine’s Day is the day of love notes, red roses, and heart shaped chocolates. Romance is awakened and we feel reconnected.  For centuries, it's celebrated as a day to declare and honor our one true love. Some love it.  Some hate it.  Some just follow the relationship protocol.  There are those who yearn for a special day of gifts, romance, and kindness. There are those who loathe the “Hallmark Holiday”, deeming it contrived and corporate.  There are those who choose not to rock the "love boat" and dutifully follow tradition.  Whether you love it, hate it, or are apathetic to it, it happens every year - and this year its happening 3 days from now.  What's one to do? Imagine removing the pressure of finding the perfect...

Psychology Today – When Children Grieve

This article was originally published in Psychology Today on February 3, 2014.  It is written by Heather Edwards and Dr. Mark Banschick. The holidays are over. But, sometimes events stop us in our tracks. Death never leaves us; it’s one reason why we so urgently celebrate Hanukah, Christmas and the New Year. We have this blessed life to live. So we grab it. Our guest blogger, Heather Edwards, tells us another tale. It is a true story about a child who lost a classmate. How are we to help children grieve? And, what do they teach us in the process? A Child's Sadness: On Christmas Day this year, my 7-year-old cousin Evan began to cry in the midst of family merriment. A sudden full body sobbing experience had overcome him. He looked up at me; face...

Psychology Today – Easy Tips for Keeping New Years Resolutions

This article is published in Psychology Today by Mark Banschick and Heather Edwards.  It is entitled, "Break Bad Habits".  It’s countdown time!  The new year marks a fresh start for new beginnings.   Be prepared on January 1 to state your New Year Resolutions and stick to them! If your plan is to lose weight, exercise more, eat healthier, save money, or build your career or social network, then get started on developing a system for success that will work for you. Resolutions without specific plans usually get pushed to the wayside by the demands of everyday life. Come April, they’re already out the window and down the street! Be prepared to keep your New Year Resolutions in 2014 using these simple tips for seeing them through to...

Psychology Today – Five Secrets of Highly Successful People

This article is published in Psychology Today by Mark Banschick and Heather Edwards.  It is entitled, "5 Tips for Success". Everyone has a unique life story. Family traditions, religious beliefs, and cultural norms differ and converge in a myriad of ways across people and places.  We embody our personal experiences and take them with us, wherever we go. We use our history as a road map through life. What's familiar is comfortable and predictable.  The downside is, it can keep us stuck in old patterns that hold us back. What if you took the road less travelled?  What if you could shed the part of your life story that is holding you back while developing those that propel you forward?  Well, you can!  Recalibrate the GPS.  Follow...

Psychology Today – Difficult Divorce? 6 ways to get unstuck.

This article, "Difficult Divorce? 6 Ways to Get Unstuck. - Divorce can work out for the best.", was originally published on November 19, 2013 by Mark Banschick, M.D. and Heather Edwards, LMHC in Psychology Today.  It addresses the basic feelings of grief, anger, and fear in divorce followed by self care and planning for a better life. Read further for tips on how to navigate this challenging life transition...